Soon I will be having my trip to Japan and I’ll be staying there for at least two months. I couldn’t think of anything else except “please, please let me have a safe trip”. It would be my first time to travel alone in an unfamiliar place. So my preparations?? briefing from my mother who works in Japan, read more about Tokyo especially about Narita airport (hehe), and I’m currently making my “to do” list so that I’ll not be wasting my precious time doing nothing. This trip will be my one shot to heaven hence I ought to do the most out of my stay in the city. Next time, I’ll be sharing photos showing a glimpse of what it feels like to be in Tokyo. Konichiwa!

Have you ever felt being in love? Or was it just an infatuation? Well, currently I’m infatuated with a person and it seems so awkward and obviously hopeless because I know I can’t be happy and be with that person. Anyway, how could one differentiate if what you’re feeling is love or merely an infatuation? base from this book entitled Marriage and the Family by Stephen A. Grunlan, infatuation is born at first sight while love takes time to develop; infatuation tends to focus on a single aspect of the other, while love focuses on the whole person. Further, infatuation is an immature emotional response to a person of the opposite sex based on superficial or idealized characteristics rather than the whole person.

Actually, authentic love could be clearly understood only when you’re already in a commitment or relationship with another. Many definitions and ideals were already publicized and written in papers yet both terms remain difficult to define. Why need a definition? Don't define IT, just feel IT. I remembered so well when I was young and many of my friends had autograph notebooks and the part you need to fill up was the “Define Love” corner. On that particular aspect, I was having a hard time answering it myself so what I did was I merely wrote the lyrics of a song that describes love. Up until now, I can’t honestly share what love is and what infatuation means. All I know is I’ve already experienced both and I just know what I’m feeling is Love or Infatuation. It comes with your intuition I guess. I’m just happy knowing that I am infatuated with a friend and I don’t want to make these feelings worse to wind up with love. According to M.H. Ford, infatuation is a mild form of attraction – I want to adhere unto this thought until these feelings are gone.

Sources:

Stephen A. Grunlan. Marriage and the Family. 2nd Ed. 1999. pp.59-61

M.H. Ford. Personal Power. 2004. p124

Today I missed my 7am – 3pm shift in the ER because I came by the hospital late enough that I was considered absent. The staff already started their endorsement so I voluntarily went home because for me there’s no chance I could attend the said duty. There are no hard feelings, though, behind my absence. It’s just that today should have been my first exposure in the ER and I should have minor cases within the area. So, when I went home, I immediately went back to sleep hoping my wonderful dream earlier will be flashed back again. Yet I was disappointed, somehow, because a new story was made in my dream. All I want is that specific dream I had this day! Only few people know that my happiness could only be found in my dreams; my fascination about my life can be triggered by what dreams could actually offer. I can only be happier inside my imagination than what I could experience in reality. If I could turn back time, I should not have awaken from my sleep and continue to be happy inside my own realm of thoughts.

I’m happy right now because I’m laughing at my own flaws. I was playing Special Force and I’ve already attained the position of Second Lieutenant. I felt so naïve knowing that a character on that game could be equipped with different items like buying your own boots, armor, helmet etc. Only when I reached the First Lieutenant position I discovered that fact. hehe. Also, I managed to accomplish the position without even buying any card/e-coin to purchase some items (because once I was about to buy a card at Netopia, the personnel said such cards are unavailable). Anyhow, when I bought some items for my character I was excited to play intensely because of the additional points and other benefits. Only after 3 days of playing I’ve realized and I was pissed off that those purchased items weren’t used. Why? I didn’t click them in my inventory which means those equipment were merely stored and weren’t taken advantage. In the end, I remain ignorant (after playing the best game for quite some time).